Reflecting on a year

In less than a week our little girl will be one.

So many people have said, “where did that year go?”

It’s a question I’ve asked myself so many times.

Being close to a year and also getting ready to work a few more hours have got me reflecting on Esther, who she is, how’s she’s grown and how my life has changed over the past year.

Esther daily brings me so joy. Some days she has me in hysterics with actual tears of joy at the preciousness of who she is. She has such a cheeky sense of humour.

A few weeks ago I posted this photo on Instagram. In my little blurb I said ‘Thank you Jesus for restoring the joy of motherhood to me.’

And I am so thankful. My story of a year of being mama is one that starts with six months of tears, anxiety and worry [and happy moments too but predominantly anxiety] that has been transformed into six more months of laughter, fun, preciousness and delight. I absolutely love being a mama now and can’t wait for when one day our three becomes four.

In some ways I feel robbed of my first six months. Even as I write this now my eyes are filling with tears. Maybe I’ll write more about it one day because I’m sure I’m not the only one who struggled. But in some ways I don’t feel robbed. Because without those six months, I don’t know if I’d be as truly thankful as I am now for who Esther has become and who I have become through it.

Here’s to year number two of Esther Cerys Grace. I’m excited to see who you’re going to become little one.


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